Monthly Archives: December 2012

Beauty Is Not.

It is as if my mind were an old, rusted cabinet
pressed with peeling paint and risky shelves,
like a prison for my beliefs.
The compartments complete with miscellaneous debris filling deep-
within the spaces
of each fickle
Presumption.  Promise.  Prayer.
I cannot close this dungeon
as my mind clings to nothing within it
Outlining conceptual beauty complete-
or complete absence thereof.


There is no vacancy in my heart

As I search my heart and all of my wants and needs, I am not able to find any reason as to why I need anyone.  This is a season of voluntary loneliness but something makes me weary of using that terminology since “loneliness” has such a negative connotation to it.  I assure you that my heart feels no discontent effects of loneliness- only a serene break from the clamor of other people.  

And for once, my heart is not left wanting-

No Contact

My words are wanted for dirty, dark-red murder
corroded arteries, cancerous thoughts
Metaphoric martyrdom
Or post-tragic stardom?
As illiterate as this understanding is-
wholly unethical in every anticipated way
why am I so goddamn

without ever tasting blood?

Without you leading me, my own two shaky legs must suffice
At a crossroads and the thought stings me,
which direction do I turn?
With all of three senses-

I can’t distinguish whether I am blindfolded or ear-muffed
Neither matter though.because either way I suspect it,
I’m still,
-Unable to hear you.
-Unable to let you hear me.

And no metaphor will fix this.


Wow, life is on a wild ride and it definitely seems to be looking up from this point forward.  Tomorrow marks my great grandmother’s 90th birthday party and I can’t wait to give her a call and congratulate her for surviving this tumultuous world that long!

My head is like a ping pong ball ricocheting off the wall of one idea and on to another concept and the speed of this lightening ball would singe your eyebrows clean off.  At the moment, I’m considering the job interview I have scheduled for Wednesday at marketing/ sales firm.  On the job training is required so I’m pretty up and up about this opportunity.

Accepting this opportunity also means being more structured with my time and setting aside a good chunk of it for Mellissa Anderson Photography as well as my freelance work… ai yai yai!

On top of all this, I was watching a very interesting interview with the lead vocals of Anberlin, Stephen Christian.  It really resurged my love for them because I agreed 100% with his metaphor, my faith is like my DNA.

On top of all this, I’m also experiencing the world with shaggy bangs, for the first time in my life!  Although it is somewhat unusual how much this excites me, I can’t seem to shake how awesome and sexy I feel.

-ok, enough of my self-glamorizing candor.  I hope this update is serving it’s purpose.

Don’t forget to smile.  Life will be beautiful.