They aren’t scars, only wounds.

I’m emotionally in a dark, dark place.

I’m just very emotionless right now.  Everything is going really well for me.  I have a paid internship NOW, a house to reside in, money to burn.  I feel remarkably at home in the atmosphere with having my own cubicle and my own to-do list.  Its rather nice being a productive part of society.  I’m very thrilled to tell you, I’m the editor/ proof-reader of Franchise Times magazine now!  I have my own cubicle, desk, computer, to-do list.  I feel blessed-

but I’m completely distanced from you, not by choice but by understanding that we NEED to be without each other right now.

I needed to get away from your resentment, your hostile shyness.  In my mind, you repeatedly whisper at me, “I only see your scars.” It’s hypnotic and destructive.

Such a terrible combination.

I don’t have scars.  Mark my words.  Scars don’t heal fully, they leave terrible reminders.   Mark my words, I AM FREE of scar tissue, they are but wounds!  Terrible, mind-numbing wounds.   Jesus heals wounds!  Jesus will wash away any remnant of wounds within me.

But not everything is about me:

I pray that Jesus heals you.  I pray that you turn your heart over to Jesus, the Living Manifestation of God The Father.

Everything is light around me, except this innate, darkened longing for only you- but I stop myself, violently shake my head back and forth and recollect my senses.

I’m still a whole person and Jesus is walking with me, which explains the blessings with a job, nice housing and friends…

I pray that you are doing alright.  Every night I pray for your well-being, for your best.

Advertisements

About hannahjustine

This is my life story. Don't expect for me to entirely spill the beans on everything, but my life is certainly a sloppy recipe of writing, research, realizations and love. Basically, I'm learning as I go. I strive to positively impact my community, my sphere of influence. I believe that this happens only through living your life to the fullest! View all posts by hannahjustine

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: